Tagged: long distance relationships

So Close, Yet So Far

Distance

It’s official, Mark will be moving to Japan on March 24th!  Cue fireworks and confetti!  He was contacted by his contracting organization and was given the details about what city he’ll be living in and when his orientation will be.  We were both unable to sit still, while waiting to hear where he was going to be placed.  Sometimes I felt like I was more antsy than he was.  We were super excited to finally know a set date and location, but at the same time, my heart was in my stomach.  You see that screenshot above?  That’s the driving route from my city (A) to Mark’s city (B).  So close, yet so far.  My day dreams of us being able to hang out every weekend, traveling all over Japan was shattered (okay, that’s  a little dramatic).  But in reality, deep down, I knew there was a very small chance that we would be placed in the same prefecture, let alone the same area.

By train, it will take about 3 1/2 hours if I take the bullet train, but if you know a thing or two about the bullet train, it’s really expensive.  The cheaper, but still expensive alternative will take about 5 hours to get there.  It’s definitely double, just not frequently, due to the travel time and the cost.  I guess we will still be in a long distance relationship, but at least the distance has shortened.  It’s better than him living in Hokkaido or Kyushu, and definitely better than him living in California.  I’ve become more accepting that we will probably only be able to see each other once a month and I’m looking on the brighter side.  He could have been placed way up in the north or way down in the south, which would require an airplane or the shinkansen to travel to.  Mark’s placement in Shizuoka Prefecture is really lucky.  I’m also looking forward to visiting him because not only does it look beautiful, he’s close to Mt. Fuji!  Look!  It’s practically in his backyard.  We’ll keep looking forward to spending time with each other, focusing on our goals to motivate us to work hard for each other.

After that initial shock, I have come to terms with reality and I’m more than excited for him to start his new life here in Japan.  I know he’s going to have such an amazing experience, teaching, traveling, and eating everything.  We’re going to have so many great adventures ahead of us whether its through teaching or traveling.  Right now, I want February to end and the end of March to come, so I can travel to Shizuoka to see him and wish him luck before he starts teaching!

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Another “See You”

Sweet Smores

See you.  The words I end every English class with and words I said to Mark when I left for Japan.  It wasn’t a goodbye for us, it was a see you later.  And it was a see you later.  Mark’s dad was so kind to buy Mark a ticket to Japan for his birthday and we were able to spend 2 1/2 weeks together after being apart of 5 months.  Those weeks were probably among the best 2 1/2 weeks I’ve had so far since I got here.  Unfortunately, those weeks flew by and I had to say see you to Mark again.  This time, we only have to wait 2 months before seeing each other again, since Mark is starting his position as an English teacher in March!  I couldn’t be happier and excited for him.  He wanted this opportunity and I’m so proud that he was accepted into his program  We’re still not sure where he’s going to be placed, but he will probably find out within the next week or two, so fingers crossed!

I’ve been feeling sad and empty all day.  Mark left today (or yesterday, once I post this) and the way we said our see you’s wasn’t how I pictured it would be.  I really wanted to go to the airport with Mark and see him off, being able to spend up until the last second with him before he went through security.  Of course, life doesn’t work the way you want it to sometimes.  I had a taiko performance in the morning and I found out the night before that I had to rehearse at 8:40 am.  There was no way I could go to the airport with Mark or even take him to the bus stop.  Mark told me he was fine going to the airport by himself, but I still wanted to go.  When I woke up, I saw that it was snowing and called a friend from taiko to drive me to the community center where we were performing.  She told me that she’d be at my apartment in 10 minutes.  10 minutes?!  Seriously?!  I’m half dressed and Mark is packing!  When she got to my apartment, it was time to part ways all of a sudden.  Already?  This can’t be the last day!  We really have to leave each other right now?  This is last time we’ll see each other in 2 months?  We gave each other a hug and kiss, exchanged some dialogue, and said our see you’s.  I was on the verge of tears…  Then I walked out the door.  I wanted to burst out and cry.  I wanted to skip the performance.  I wanted to make it snow so hard, no one could go anywhere.  I wanted to call the airlines and have them cancel that flight, so Mark couldn’t go home.  My heart was sinking, but I had to hold it together.

I did my performance and when I came home,  I came home to my empty apartment.  I burst into tears.  It really happened.  Today was the last day and I just walked out door this morning like it was just a regular day.  I loved coming back to Mark at my apartment and being able to have someone to talk to, to have a fun time with just lounging around.  Now, it’s so quiet and cold.  It makes me sad.  This feeling will probably go away in a few days once I get used to living by myself again, but in the meantime, having to say see you again was really hard.  It was just as hard to say see you this time, if not, even harder.  It was especially hard because of the how quickly we had to part ways, but I’m so thankful for our time together.  These past 2 1/2 weeks ignited another spark in our relationship as we felt refreshed and new.  We were in a new environment together which called for so many discoveries and adventures.  Every second of everyday was an adventure for us.  There were just so many things to experience together from eating ramen all the time to guiding Mark to see his first shrines.

I learned that the distance isn’t a giant boulder that you can’t move in a relationship, but one of those track and field hurdles.  There will be some bumps a long the way, but in the long run, it’s all worth it.  Your love and dedication to each other along with your goals with your partner will help you work through the distance.  The distance has helped us make our relationship stronger.  We’ve had to become more open and understanding about so many things, especially when you have minimal time to talk.  We’ve become better people and better partners.  These next two months will help us grow even stronger as we work towards our relationship goal.  After these two months, we will be living in the same country and we’ll have the opportunity to travel, eat, and experience so many things together and we couldn’t be happier.

Big Surprise! I’m heading to Japan!

InteracLogo

So Mallory and I have been hinting about this from our previous post, but we haven’t really said anything, but… I’M MOVING TO JAPAN AT THE BEGINNING OF APRIL! I didn’t say anything because I was afraid I wasn’t going to get in, I didn’t want to jinx my chances. But it all started when I applied to Interac. Mallory’s friend recommended me into it (I want to thank her also). So I applied thinking I wasn’t going to get in, especially after weeks without a reply. Randomly my house phone rang, and my grandma picked up and she said “Mark its for you!” I was thinking who would be calling me at this time, I never get phone calls…haha…(I’m a loser) But I got the call and the person asked me whether I was interested in Interac. I said “YES OF COURSE” and then the person later told me that there will be a phone and in-person interview. I did both and I felt really good about it. Then when I went to the in-person interview I performed a demonstration and I think I did really well :)…Again I didn’t want to tell myself I got it because I don’t want to jinx it. A few weeks have gone by and at 11:17 pm, I got an email telling me “Congratulations on being selected to be an Assistant Language Teacher.” Right there and then I was the happiest person in the world. Not because I have a job, but because I could be with Mallory. The placement won’t be disclosed until mid January though. Now, all those times we Skyped and expressed how sad we were because of the uncertainty of the future can now be gone, because now the future looks really bright, I can’t wait to travel around the world, be lazy and cuddle, and just be around each other like old times. So I would like to thank Interac, my friends and family, the people following this blog giving Mallory and I moral support, and lastly Mallory who has given me hope every time I felt down. I’m going to miss California, but I can’t wait to start our next journey in life. My advice, LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP CAN WORK, it’s about the effort and commitment you put into it.

Mark